


A Different Road

by greekowl87



Series: Tumblr Prompts [39]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: AU, F/M, IWTB, MSR, Pregnant Dana Scully
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:53:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23927932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greekowl87/pseuds/greekowl87
Summary: I got a prompt request for an IWTB AU where Scully is pregnant, in particular, that cheek brush scene with Agent Whitney. Except I couldn't do a scene. I wrote my take on how the move IWTB might go down if Scully was pregnant during it. I can't do a scene, I have to do the entire thing.
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully
Series: Tumblr Prompts [39]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/822135
Comments: 8
Kudos: 45





	A Different Road

**Author's Note:**

> The original anon request: “Can you write an AU where Scully is pregnant throughout IWTB? How would that cheek brush scene with Agent Whitney go down?”
> 
> I didn’t want to set this up as a scene by scene for the entire movie so I tried to imagine it as a series of missing scenes/essential ones. I hope you like. P.S. I got the lines from the transcript from Inside the X. Thanks to @gaycrouton for the beta and @peacenik0for letting me pick her brain with this prompt.

In the early morning hours, Scully awoke to Mulder gently caressing the small swell of her stomach that just started to show a month ago. “Good morning,” he whispered, kissing her soothingly on her neck. “How’s the little one this morning?”

“We’re good,” she whispered, snuggling against him. She turned her head to meet his kiss. “Daddy needs to behave because mommy has to work.”

“I know,” he whispered. She could hear the sadness in his voice. Their relationship had been rather strained over the past few years but she hoped this unborn child would mean something more. “Will you be late tonight?”

“No, I’ll be home around four.” She yawned as his hand snaked further down. “Mulder.”

“Come on, Scully, I can be quick. We can be slow later.”

“When the baby comes, we won’t have much time.”

“Well, it will give me something to do since I’m stuck here at home all day.”

This was a touchy subject between them and they tried not to bring it up. “I have my 21-week sonogram in two weeks. Would you be willing to risk it? Come out with me and see it?” She broached the subject carefully. “I want you there this time. I don’t want it to be like last time.”

William’s bitter memory.

“This won’t be like last time,” he whispered. He kissed her again. “I’m here. Nothing is going to happen to me or him.”

“You mean her?” She challenged him. Let them believe. “What do you think?”

“You want a girl?”

“I just want our child to be healthy and happy.”

Mulder smiled. His hand sunk lower. She clenched her thighs. “This is good for the baby, right?”

“And the mommy.” She whispered breathily. “God, I wish you would shave your beard.”

“Quickly?”

“Hmm?”

She was lost in the wave of emotion as he whispered softly in her ear, kissed her, and continued his work. “We have a future,” he whispered. Repeating this between became a mantra. “We have a home. We are safe. And, we will have a child. We’ll have a family. Everything’s perfect.”

“I don’t want to lose you,” she confessed as her body released its tension. “I can’t lose you again. Not again.”

“You won’t. I promise.” He kissed her. “No, go get ready. I’ll go downstairs and get you breakfast.”

Mulder got up to leave her and she stared out the dark window. Despite everything, they had a future.

* * * * *

Work was lousy. Father Ybarra got under her skin, her cases were bothering her, and that FBI agent. All Scully wanted to do was go home and cuddle with Mulder. But then again, that was tumultuous as well. As she drove back to her home, two things played in her mind: the Fearon case and the FBI agent asking about Mulder. The FBI agent struck her the most and it hit the most tender nerve. How did they know? Could they come and take him away from her all over again?

After she pushed open the gate to their property and drove up to the unremarkable house. She hoped Mulder wasn’t isolating himself again when she got home and she played with the idea of not telling Mulder but...what was his name? Agent Drummy? A fellow FBI agent’s life at stake. That had been her once. She decided to make up her mind. She would tell him.

* * * * *

Scully’s mind was racing. Father Joe. Dealing with the Fearon case. She touched her baby bump as a reminder of the present. This wasn’t like it was with William. Mulder was alive. They no longer had to face the dangers they had in the FBI, chasing the darkness, and Mulder was here with her. But her was still a fugitive And they had a home where they could live out their life.

Throughout the day, she had done her best to keep the case at bay and focus on Christian Fearon, but he had gotten to her. The poor child reminded her of William. William. The mere thought of her, no, their lost son, sent her into panic mood. She cried in her office, sending her office mate running away. The pain of their lost son and their unborn child became too much for her to handle. It took all her will to try and keep herself together as she finished out her shift for that day. 

She stopped off at a pizzeria and picked up a half pepperoni, peppers, and mushroom pizza. Near the pizzeria, there was a RedBox. In a snap decision, she picked a film, Pirates of the Caribbean: At the Edge of the World. That would be just perfect; something to distract them from all this craziness. She just hoped Mulder had cold ginger ale for her.

She balanced the pizza and DVD to the passenger side of the car. Her phone was ringing. “Mulder?”

“Scully? Are you on your way home yet?”

“I was just picking up dinner. Are you okay?”

She could hear the same passion that he used to have when he would call her with a new case. Her heart twisted and a flash came back from the past. She remembered how he rushed off to the oil rig with Doggett. She almost lost him. Again. How close was she to losing him again, especially now that he was working with the FBI? “I’m great, Scully. I can’t wait to tell you how the case went!”

“Mulder,” she warned. “I don’t want to hear about it. Not right now.”

“Okay, okay,” he chuckled. “No work.”

Work. She cringed inwardly. “I got dinner.”

“Pizza. Our pizza? Pepperoni, mushrooms, and peppers?”

“What else? I also got a movie.”

“I got our ginger ale,” he said in a sing-song voice. She smiled. Ever since they learned she was pregnant again, he did everything to make her feel comfortable, including giving up alcohol. “Movie and pizza? Just like old times?”

“Just like old times.”

Scully drove home and smiled to see the lights on in their home. Mulder was on the porch to greet her. He jogged down the stairs to help her. “I got you,” he called.

“Mulder, I’m pregnant, not an invalid.” She got out of the car. He trapped her against the Ford Fusion and smiled. “Mulder!” She laughed.

“I missed you.”

“I know,” she whispered.

The passion was electric. Instead, Scully leaned forward and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck in a hug. He smiled into her neck and embraced her. She breathed deeply. Mulder rubbed her back and whispered, “Are you okay?”

“I’m just glad you’re here,” she whispered. She pressed her forehead against his. “It’s been a tough day.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?” He kissed her brow and continued to hold her. His hands ran up and down her back. “Scully?”

“Movie and a pizza? I just want to relax,” she murmured. “It’s been a tough day.”

“Okay,” he whispered. He massaged her shoulders gently. “You go inside and get changed. I’ll get dinner ready. Thank you, Scully.”

“For what?”

His hand went down and gently caressed her small baby bump. “Everything.”

“You won’t ever stop doing that, huh?” She smiled and kissed his cheek. “I’ll get changed.”

Despite Mulder still being considered a fugitive, she had never been happier. She pushed the FBI case and the Fearon child to the back of her mind for the time being. She changed into her purple silk pajamas and when she came back downstairs, the smell of fresh pizza wafted through her nostrils. “God, that smells so good.”

“Pirates of the Caribbean? Really, Scully?”

“Amuse me.” She touched her belly instinctively as she sat on the couch and Mulder smiled. “Give me my food.”

“You are so beautiful. Sit, my queen and I shall deliver it to you.”

Scully sat down on their couch and sighed. Mulder carried two plates and two cans of cold ginger ale. He gave her a plate and set the drinks on the coffee table. “Ready?” He asked, grabbing the remote.

She nodded, her mouth was already full. He smiled and set his own plate down. Scully automatically curled up next to him, still eating her pizza. Mulder draped a blanket around them and she snuggled closer. “This is what I imagined all those years ago, Mulder. When I was pregnant with William.” She yawned and burrowed her face into his soft shirt, leaving greasy stains. “Moments like this.”

“This is what I wanted too.” He glanced down at her and pulled her long red hair out of its messy bun. “What?” she murmured. She pressed her face into his chest to hide her yawn. “Mulder?”

“I like your hair down,” he whispered.

His fingers ran through the long tendrils of her hair and she hummed. The pizza was ignored and Mulder, as much as he wanted to make sure she was okay, chose to enjoy this moment. As the climactic fight sign in the maelstrom was about to begin between the pirate ships, Scully was cuddled against Mulder, with a blanket pulled up to her knees. Her eyes were growing heavy and more than once she caught her dozing off. He smiled and caressed back her hair. “You and baby ready for bed?” He whispered.

“Movie,” she whispered.

“We can finish it and our pizza tomorrow. And the movie.” 

Scully sighed and nodded. She grabbed his hand and ran it over the small curve of her swollen stomach. “Do you feel that?” She whispered. She was half asleep. “We did that. We did this.”

Mulder nuzzled her hair and breathed deeply. He could only imagine what Scully was going through. With the case, he felt himself being pulled under the lure of mystery again, but he didn’t have Scully with him. He couldn’t do this without her. He remembered her lingering gaze in Richmond and her reluctance to take the case file. As much as he wanted to spar with her about theories, he felt it would do her more of a burden than anything. As his hand traced her stomach, he tried to imagine what it would have been like with William. But he had now. He could feel her pregnant belly, now just showing. Their child. “Our future. Our present.” He kissed her. “Are you ready for bed?”

She nodded into his shirt and stifled a yawn. “Let me get up.”

“No, I got you.” 

Mulder scooped her up into his arms and she signed contentedly against him, her eyes still closed. She hummed in contentment. “I wish you were there the first time, but you’re here now,” she said again.

Scully, in her semi-awake state, hummed again. While she missed being able to go out with Mulder, one of her favorite things about his isolation was his exercise regime. She could swear he was fitter than when he was in the FBI. 

He carried Scully up the creaky stairs. She turned into him as he eased her onto their bed. He bent down and kissed her cheek. She hummed again. “Where are you going?”

“Get ready for bed. Be back in a few.”

Mulder changed into a pair of blue sleeping pants and stripped off his tee-shirt. He stared at himself in the kitchen mirror. The overgrown beard and shaggy hair struck a chord with him. Never before had he let himself go that far. But this case was bringing out the old Fox Mulder; the one who chased monsters in the dark with Agent Scully. Except, Scully was a different person. He closed his eyes, wishing she was there with him today with Father Joe. He shook his head and pulled at his face. Despite being 46 years old, and now as an expectant father, he wished he could do more. The case weighed on his mind but then Scully...his hand running over his unborn child, that was his reminder.

“Mulder?”

“Coming.”

He turned off the bathroom light and crawled into their bed. Scully turned into him and whispered, still half asleep, “Hold me?”

“Is this what pregnant Scully was like?”

“Hmm?”

“When you had William.”

“I missed you, day and night. I wished you were there every step of the way. I would dream of you holding me, doing what you do now.” She blinked sleepily and smiled. “You’re here now.”

Mulder enveloped her and whispered, “I’m here now.”

“Arms,” she commanded.

“Yes, ma’am.” Scully cuddled next to Mulder as he held her. Her brain was still racing despite being half asleep. She nuzzled his chest and his hand automatically went to her abdomen. “I’m here now, Scully. Sleep.’

* * * * *  
In the early morning hours, Scully had freed herself and found herself wide awake. She rolled over onto her right side and pulled their comforter close. Thoughts flooded through her head: the Fearon case, the FBI case, Mulder…

There was her own maelstrom raging inside of her. Having Mulder work for the government again, with the FBI no less, it bothered her. She remembered the morning she had taken her pregnancy test out of a hunch. Then she remembered telling Mulder. He cried. He held her and cried.

But that was the least of her worries. She used to imagine when she was pregnant with William the picture-perfect ending that her and Mulder always deserved. But this new, unborn child, she began to second guess herself on everything. A child was supposed to make things better but she was tired. She was tired of running and hiding with him. She just wanted him back in her life. She wanted a happy ending. They deserved it. She sighed as Mulder’s hand slid down her thigh and he kissed her. “I can feel you thinking.”

“I'm sorry, can't sleep.”

She felt Mulder’s breath deeply behind her neck, lift his head, and rest it along his cheek. She shivered as his arms came around her again. She sighed again and instinctively took his hand and placed it against her pregnant belly. He kissed her again. “Actually, I have a little something for that.” 

She felt him nudge her, his length gently brushing against her behind, and tightening his arms around her. She laughed. “Just a little something?”

He smiled. “Thank you. What's the matter?”

Scully pulled him closer. “I have a patient. A young boy with a rare brain disease and he's very, very sick.”

“Why haven't you told me about this before?”

She whispered in defeat, “I thought there was something I could do.

“There's not?”

Years of working with Mulder, just being with him, making the choice to make him her life partner taught her how to believe. “Well, there's radical treatments but nobody wants to talk about those. Even the experts say there's nothing to be done. Nothing but let him die. So I'm lying here cursing God for all his cruelties.”

He hummed, nuzzling her. “And do you think God is losing any sleep?”

“Why bring a kid into the world just to make him suffer? I don't know, Mulder, I've got such a connection to this boy.” 

“How old is he?” He caressed her pregnant belly as a reminder to himself of the present and that he was here now. “Scully?”

“You think it's because of William.”

He took a deep breath and held her closer so Scully could feel it. She closed her eyes in response. He brought her hand down to rest with his on their unborn child. “I think our son left us both with an emptiness that can't be filled. But this moment, Scully, right now. We have a second chance. Just go to sleep. Let me curse God for a while. I won’t let you go. By the way, we’re gonna a girl. A little girl just as smart as you and clever as me.”

She smiled sleepily. “Thank you.”

They kissed and Mulder teased her by rubbing her beard into her cheek. She laughed and tried to turn away. “Scratchy beard.”

“I’ll shave it for you this weekend.” Scully smiled as they settled back down to sleep. “Try and get some sleep, Scully. You need it.”

“Oh,” she blinked before sleep took her, “There was something weird on that toxicology report of the severed arm.”

“What?”

“I looked over the FBI evidence reports again, and in the tissue, there were traces of a drug that's commonly given to patients being treated with radiation. And also traces of a drug called Acepromazine.”

“Why is that weird?”

Before she could drift off to sleep like this but she whispered, “Acepromazine's an animal tranquilizer.”

Mulder let her go and sat up in bed. She shivered at his lost warmth. “Now I can't sleep.”

“Mulder?”

He stormed into the bathroom and switched on the light s on either side of the bathroom mirror. He stared at himself and spied Scully behind him. Scully’s heart was racing. She recognized this Mulder and it scared her. He was the edge of something and she knew what would happen. “Mulder…”

“What is animal tranquilizer doing in the tissue sample of a man's severed arm?”

“I can't even begin to speculate. Mulder, please, come back to bed.” She appeared behind him in the doorway. Maybe she could talk some sense into him. “Mulder, please.”

“He said he heard barking dogs,” Mulder explained. He was lathering his face with shaving cream and Scully felt her gut twisting. “What?”

Scully braced herself against the doorway. “Who?

“Father Joe.’

He took out his razor. “Mulder, what are you doing?”

He looked at her in the mirror and saw her worried faced. “Is it a tranquilizer that you might give a dog?”

She sighed, trying to consider her words carefully. Scully couldn’t lose him again. He was the edge and she could see the same passion and fire that she fell in love with erupting again like a sleeping volcano. “He's a phony, Mulder. He pulls these so-called visions out of thin air, and now he's got you straining to connect them.”

“When I see a man cry tears of blood at a crime scene he recognizes without ever having visited, I need to go out on a limb, you know what I'm saying?”

“I do,” she pressed. “Mulder…” She remembered their cases where her faith was challenged. It was challenged now. “Tears of blood?”

“Yeah, some trick, huh? How do you fake that?”

In the distance, her blackberry phone was ringing. As she left him, Mulder continued to lather his beard. She rushed out to the hall to grab her phone. She glanced at the fish tank that had survived Mulder’s apartment, hers...her mother kept it while they were on the run, now it was back. She remembered watching it the night she fell asleep after the Buddhist temple. All signs lead her to him and this path they would take together. The phone kept ringing. She hit the green button. “Hello.”

It was Agent Drummy. “Hello, Dr. Scully?”

“Yes.”

“I have Dakota Whitney for you.”

Scully could hear the phone being switched to someone else. Her heart was clenching; this was all too familiar. Agent Whitney came on the line, “I'm sorry to call this hour.”

“Has there been a break?” She asked; probably more than needed too.

She could feel Mulder loom over her. She wished it was under new circumstances. Mulder pressed, and she asked, “They find her?”

“We're pursuing another lead.”

Scully sighed inwardly. “The same source.”

“The same source. New news,” Agent Whitney confirmed. 

She could feel Mulder and she answered briefly, “We’ll be there.”

“Scully, who was that?”

“Agents Whitney and Drummy. There’s been a break.”

“We gotta go.” He still had shaving cream on his face and she closed her eyes, feeling tears. “Scully? What is it?”

She grabbed his hand and pressed it against their unborn child. “I may have trauma, I acknowledge this.” Her voice was becoming worse. “But I can’t lose you again. Not again. I won’t loset you to this.”

It never crossed Mulder’s mind to think about the trauma she felt when he was abducted. “You won’t.”

“Go shave,” she whimpered. 

Scully needed to sit down. Her head was spinning and heart racing. She stumbled to the bed and tried to breathe, placing a hand on her heart. He watched her and felt his own heart race. Scully...their child. He shaved quickly, cutting himself in the process. She could feel his gaze and could feel his unspoken communication; he couldn’t go there without her but he didn’t want to hurt her anymore with the darkness. “Scully,” he called.

She came, like a beckoned ghost. “I can’t do this, Mulder. Not again.”

“I’m still here.”

“I can’t lose you,” she whispered. She took his hand and pressed it against her stomach. “We can’t do this…”

Mulder held her and his own tears burned his eyes. “Scully, you’re not going to lose me again.”

“I can’t,” she whispered. “We can’t.”

“I cannot go there without you. Come to the shower so we can get ready.”

You’ve done plenty without me, she wanted to say but she let him lead her into their shower. Mulder’s lips were on her, tasting her collar bone before the water even turned hot. He pulled her in and went to town.

Against the steam from their shower, things were left forgotten. She curled her arms around his neck tightly. He touched her stomach and whispered. “I haven’t forgotten,” he murmured into her ear. “You and baby Scully are what’s the most important.”

She hugged him closer. “I should wash you,” she whispered.

“Let me take care of you,” he whispered. “I wanted so badly last night.”

“Your stamina is impressive,” she chuckled. A brief distraction. Another band-aid over their overgrowing wounds. His eyebrows waggled. “Mulder!”

“I shaved.”

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted you to shave?”

He was already on his knees in front of her. “Scully, never forget, you and baby Scully are number one, especially you. No FBI, no Agent Whitney, no one or nothing will ever change that.”

She felt tears as he kissed her mons. “My one and what...six billion now? I can’t keep track of fast the world grows but you are mine. Mine alone.” She braced herself again their bathroom’s slippery walls. His magical tongue worked wonders that only she would witness. After a few minutes, her knees began to weaken and Mulder eased her down on top of him. “We could,” he whispered.

She brushed his smooth cheek. “We have a three-hour drive. When we get home? I’m off tomorrow.”

“You are?”

She nodded. His back got the brunt of the shower of the hot water as his hand brought the sponge up her back. “I’m not dirty,” she whispered in reverence. “And yes. No work tomorrow. You and me?”

“And the baby makes three.”

“Baby makes three.” She brushed his lips. “Let’s get ready. I’ll drive.”

* * * * * 

Three hours later, on the snowy roads, Scully drove herself and Mulder to the crime scene. There were already snowy roads and Mulder would have volunteered to drive, but he knew he was in capable hands. But as they arrived at the barn of the crime scene, there were lights, FBI jackets, and police everywhere. Scully found herself trying to breathe deeply and Mulder daughter her hand. “They aren’t taking me,” he told her. “Not again.”

Scully parked the car and nodded. It took a minute for her to park as she tried to draw in deep breaths. “Like old times, Mulder?”

“Just like old times. We got this.”

They squeezed each other’s hands as they exited the Ford Fusion. Like old partners, they emerged in unison. Scully stood there for a moment and tried to breathe. This was too much. This was too familiar. Mulder came to her side and claimed her hands. “We got this,” he whispered. “We, Scully. We got this.”

She nodded and tried to drum up the old Agent Scully that rested in her.

“One more time. Ten minutes!”

Agent Whitney’s voiced stormed over the snow. Scully took the lead as she slammed her car door “Did you find her?”

Whitney shook her head. “No” The agent stared at Mulder in a way that made Scully bristle inwards. She grasped his hand but it went unnoticed. “What did you do?”

Mulder arched an eyebrow. “What?”

Agent Whitney peeled off a piece of toilet paper off Mulder’s cheek. He winced away and Scully surged forward putting herself between him and her. “Don’t touch him. You said there was news.”

The possessiveness that came from Scully made Mulder recoil as if he was in Agent Whitney’s possession. He squeezed her shoulder. “It’s okay, Scully. It’s okay.”

Agent Whitney was clearly caught off guard by Scully’s reaction. Mulder’s hand instinctively covered her stomach and the agent saw the gesture. “I apologize. The news is our psychic led us to the exact same site he led us to before.”

“The same sight,” Mulder pressed.

Whitney led them away and both followed to where Father Joe stood, smoking a cigarette. Agent Drummy stood by. The father smirked. “You’re going to find it.

Drummy replied, “You keep saying that.”

Father Joe reminded him, “You're going to find a body.”

Drummy was annoyed. “You keep telling us she's alive.”

“She is”.

Drummy turned to Agent Whitney. “We can’t do this all night. These guys’ are running on empty.”

Over the snow, Whitney looked at Mulder and Scully. “I'm sorry for bringing you out here.”

Drummy shouted, waving his arms, “Hey, let's go, fellas. Bring it in. Let's go. Bring it in, gentlemen, time to go home.”

Mulder began to follow Father Joe, leaving Scully behind. She reached for him. He shed her off like a forgotten piece of clothing. “Tell me. Tell me what you see,” he exclaimed.

Father Joe whispered, “I see a face. I see eyes staring out.”

“Who? Who is it?”

“It's unclear. Like through dirty glass. It's out there, I know it.”

Suddenly, Father Joe dropped his cigarette in the snow and walked forward. It was as if something was calling him. Mulder followed, twisting his head to ask, “Scully, what does he mean like through dirty glass?”

“Mulder,” Scully tried to calm him. “Mulder, please.”

He stopped.”What.”

She reached for her hand and resisted placing it on her stomach. “Stop.”

“Okay, just feel free to give up like everybody else.”

Scully huffed. “Mulder, that’s not it Wait a minute! Mulder!” She was furious. “This is not my job anymore, Mulder. It’s not yours either. We don’t do this anymore!”

“No, that's right, that's right, you're just like my booking agent now, right?”

She was stung by her comment. “You're right. This is my fault.”

“What do you mean, it's your fault.” He could hear the hurt in her voice. “Scully?”

“For getting you involved in this, Mulder.” She turned away. She felt the cold freeze her tears.

“No, no. It was the right thing to do, Scully,” he tried to console her. He started to walk in the direction of Father Joe. “At least I can do something.”

Blame being pregnant. She took a deep breath and shouted, “This is not about finding an FBI agent. This is about you trying to save your sister.”

Those words stopped him and he turned to face her. “My sister is dead. You want to play this game, Scully?” Oh, he was fighting to hurt her; she recognized that. “I’m doing this for you. Our child.”

“And we’re doing that shit all over again!” She shouted. FBI agents looked at them and Scully shielding her face. Mulder came closer so they could talk more intimately. “It hasn't stopped you from looking for her. Mulder, I have been through this too many years with you, believing you can save her. You cannot save her, not now and not ever.”

“But I can save you.”

“Mulder, I’m right here! I am right here in front of you!” She cried. “I’m right here!”

She watched him observe Father Joe walk across the snow. Mulder became Agent Mulder in front of her. He looked past her and called, “I need those men back!”

Agent Whitney, not looking particularly happy, signaled the search team back into action. Scully was devastated. “What are you doing?”

“I'm trying to ignore you.”

“Why, Mulder?”

Mulder stalked away towards Father Joe, Scully followed him, jogging the last stretch. They reached a snow-covered clearing. “This is it! Here it is!” Father Joe cried. He dropped to his knees to scoop acway the snow and to her surprise, Mulder joined him.“This is it.”

Scully watched, her heart wrenching feeling it happen all over again. Just like William. Just like this new unborn child. Yes, he was here this time but she was losing him just like she had before. She watched him dig through the snow. “We need shovels,” Mulder called.

The agents swarmed to clear the snow as Father Joe and Mulder stood to clear the way. Amidst the frenzy, Mulder glanced at his partner. They’ve always excelled in unspoken communication. A mere glance told Scully all she needed to know. She blinked away her tears. Suddenly, the agents hit something.

“It's solid ice,” Agent Drummy stated

Mulder scraped at it with a shovel. Scully could feel her heartbreaking. “Mulder,” she whispered.

“No, it's dirty glass,” he called. He quickly demanded a flashlight. “Flashlight!” Underneath the snow they uncover the head of the missing FBI agent Monica Bannan. Mulder got up, shaking his head. “You're going to need resources.”

Mulder walked away past the FBI agents and Scully, without saying another word.  
She reached out her hand uselessly before it fell to her side. Agent Whitney called, “We need equipment. Concrete saws and a backhoe.”

Drummy echoed, “You two get in the line. You come with me.”

Scully watched as Mulder walked off. Her worst fears were coming true and her heart was breaking. She closed her eyes, trying to contain this new pang. Suddenly, Father Joe was standing behind her. She sensed this and twisted around to face him.

“Don't give up.”

Scully shivered at his words. She tried to dismiss them as she stormed back to their car where Mulder was leaning the hood of their car. “Are you ready?” He asked shortly.

“Mulder,” she bit her lip. “I’m…”

He shook his head. “Let’s forget about it, okay? I’ll go to Quantico in the morning. Let’s go back home so you can get some sleep.”

“Mulder, talk to me!” She demanded. “Anything!”

“I’m fine,” he said shortly.

“You hurt me,” she cried. She was long over hiding her emotions from him. “Mulder!”

“Can we talk about this in the car?” He asked, striding over into the passenger side.

In the car, she started it and lowered the radio. Mulder sighed and tented his finger in front of his face. “What the hell was that about?”

“Is this healthy for the baby?”

“What? My pent up aggression? My anger? No, it isn’t, Mulder! Like you give a damn!” The last line came out of her mouth from a lifetime ago. “You didn’t give a damn on that oil rig when I had William, why would you care now? I thought things had changed between us! You promised me this wouldn’t happen again.”

She smacked the steering wheel in frustration. “And Agent Whitney? Why the hell does she get to touch you let that? She’s not your partner? I am! You’re mine!”

“Excuse me?”

Scully wasn’t done yet. “This isn’t like the old days, Mulder. I am not your booking agent! I am your partner. I am going to have your child in the next few months. Does that mean nothing?” 

She was crying. Fuck pregnancy hormones. “Scully,” Mulder whispered.

“I can’t lose you again,” she whispered. “Not again.”

There it was. Her heart left unfiltered. She gripped the steering wheel tightly. Mulder calmly peeled off his gloves and took her hands. He took her gloved hands and took them off. “I haven’t forgotten, Scully.”

Her eyes were red with tears.

“Let me drive home.”

“I can’t. You’ll get caught.”

“Let me take care of you.” He held their hands and breathed into them. “Let me take care of you and little Scully.”

“Like you give a damn,” she spat.

Mulder eyed the FBI agents in the distance.”You’re right. I missed a lot last time but I promised this will be different.”

“It’s not,” she snapped. “You are running off for the FBI. What about the family you have here?” She gestured to her stomach. “I fucked up on William but we’re having another child, Mulder!”

He cupped her cheek. “You didn’t mess up on William. I wasn’t there. You’re right. I didn’t give you any choices. I’m sorry, Scully...I’m so sorry. But William is safe.You did the right thing.”

“Did I?”

“Let me drive, Scully.” Too tired and she nodded. Scully was so tired. Between work, the FBI case, and their child...she was so exhausted. Mulder kissed her brow. “Come on.”

Scully and Mulder switched seats. In the process, Mulder shed his jacket. Scully tried to pull on the safety belt uselessly. Mulder draped his jacket across her. She twisted to the side. “You’re still here, Mulder.”

“Where else would I be?”

“I thought you would go somewhere. I can’t lose you again,” she whispered.

“You won’t.”

She closed her eyes, tears racing down her cheeks. Mulder secured his jacket around her and clicked the seatbelt. He pushed back her hair. “Sleep, Scully. I’m not going anywhere.”

“This can’t be happening again, Mulder,” she whispered. “I won’t accept it.”

“I’ll drive us home,” he whispered.

Through sleepy eyes, Scully watched him readjust the seat and reverse and put it back in drive. “Tell me a story, Mulder,” she murmured.

He nodded and sought her hand. “Well, there once was this brilliant doctor…”

“Real story,” she whispered.

“This is a real story. There was a brilliant little redhead doctor.”

“I wasn’t little.”

Mulder shifted the car gently onto the snowy roads. “You are but that blazer contested otherwise. So,” he gazed at her, never letting go of her hand as her eyes got heavier, “a brilliant doctor came in and shook my hand. I knew then I was in love. And I was. I have never known more completion. I had met my other half and I knew right then, I would never leave her again.”

“Then one day, the doctor saw a vision from God and knew that in all things, she had made the right decisions,” she mumbled sleepily. “I have no regrets, Mulder. I want you to show me again when we get home.”

Mulder chuckled. “For you or the baby?”

“Both.”

“When we got home. Are you warm enough?”

“Perfect.”

“We’ll be home in a jiffy.”

Mulder drove Scully back to their home. As the snow continued outside, he never let go of her hand as he drove. Eventually, they came back to the unremarkable house. She was fast asleep when they got home. Mulder caressed a piece of hair from her face. She whispered his name. Mulder, feeling emboldened, parked their car and went to the passenger side. He unhooked Scully’s belt and picked her up effortlessly. She snuggled closer to him. “I got you,” he whispered.

“Love you,” she whispered.

Mulder closed his eyes and kissed her forehead. “Love you too.”

“I’m sorry for what I said, Mulder. I didn’t mean it.”

“I didn’t mean what I said either. You aren’t my booking agent,” he whispered.

“What am I?”

“My partner,” he corrected. “Mother of my child. My other half. Let’s get you inside.”

The snow was falling heavier around them. He picked her up into his arms and kicked the door closed. With some effort, he opened the screen door and to the main entrance to their house. Scully whispered, “I can walk.”

“No woman of mine needs to walk on these common grounds.”

She giggled. “I have to go to bed somehow.”

“I can undress you.”

She smiled into his neck.”I can walk upstairs. Lock up down here and join me in bed.” Mulder set her down effortlessly. “By the way, I’m not complaining about your new workout regime.”

“I’m glad,” he called, double-checking the first floor to see if everything was walked. He heard her kicking off her boots, marching up the stairs. He glanced up at the ceiling and took off his jacket. “You want anything?”

“You!”

Mulder chuckled and kicked off his shoes and jogged up the stairs. He came to their bedroom and saw Scully dressed in her lavender pajamas, her pregnant belly swelling slightly. “What time do you have work tomorrow?”

“Noon,” she yawned.

Mulder took off his shirt and his pants. “Where did I put my sleeping pants?”

Scully smirked. “In the corner. Come back to bed, Mulder.”

“Are you still mad at me?”

“No. You did hurt me though,” she whispered.

As Mulder changed back into his sleeping pants, he bent his head. “Scully,” he called. He held out his hand. “I’m sorry.”

“I know,” she whispered.

She went to him with open arms. Mulder’s heart broke as he embraced her tightly. Locked together, she nuzzled his chest. He wanted to touch her so badly. She took his hand and ran it against their unborn child. “This is our future, Mulder. I can’t and I will not lose you again.”

“A girl,” Mulder whispered into her ear confidently. “Baby Scully.”

“You want a daughter.”

“I want a healthy child with you. That’s all.”

She shivered against him and he rubbed her back instinctively. She shivered. “Let’s get back in bed. I’m freezing.”

“Fresh snow.”

“And I get to drive in it tomorrow.”

“We got about nine hours, give or take before noon. We have more than enough time for sleep and some other stuff.” Mulder eased her back onto the bed. “I’ll be more thorough tomorrow night, okay?”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” Scully’s mind was swimming. Her hormones were so much worse than with William. Mulder laid next to her and pulled her close. He kissed her neck. “How do you want it, Scully?”

“Slow.”

“Let’s get beneath the covers.”

Beneath their comforter, Mulder planted his back against her. She snuggled against him and brought his arm securely around him. Mulder took off her purple silk top until all she wore was that tank top and her pants.

“You are so beautiful,” he murmured into her shoulder. “Scully.”

She tried not to think of it as pity sex. “Show me,” she encouraged him

Mulder whispered, catching her lips, “This is just a preview.”

His hand and fingers snaked downwards. “You promised this morning you would get back to me.”

“I did, didn’t I?”

Scully wanted to be on top but the dynamics of her pregnancy caused difficulty. Mulder’s muscled chest pressed into her back. “I wanted this so badly, Scully,” Mulder whispered. “I wanted to be there in the beginning.”

“You’re here now,” she whispered. “That’s all that matters.”

“Let me love you,” he whispered back. “I’m sorry for earlier, Scully.”

She twisted to face him. Gently, Scully traced his face. “You aren’t Agent Whitney’s partner. I don’t like the way she touched you,” Scully said. She forced him to look at her. “She doesn’t know you like I do.”

“Let me,” he murmured. He rolled Scully onto her back. He caressed her swollen stomach. “You’re right. You're the mother of my children, born and unborn.” He kissed down her neck. She tried to move but his powerful arm stopped her. “No. I’m going to have my way with you. I saw how possessive you were with Agent Whitney.”

“I won’t share you with anyone.”

“I know,” Mulder whispered. “I don’t expect you to. But you are also afraid of the FBI taking me. They won’t. It’s okay, Scully; we’re going to be okay.”

He kissed her mons through the silk pajamas. His thumbs hooked around the waist of her hips pulled the silken purple pajamas down. He breathed deeply. “God, I love you, Scully.”

“How much?”

“Enough to come back from the dead.”

“Mulder, don’t talk like that. Please.”

“What do you want?”

She lifted the blanket to see him. “Make love to me.”

“How do you want it?” He emerged from the blankets. “You were awfully possessive. Do you want to be on top?”

She nodded. “On your back.”

Mulder chuckled. He slipped off his own boxers and pants-dropping them over the side of their bed. Scully stripped away the rest of her clothes. Against the cold air, she moved to straddle his waist. Mulder breathed deeply and whispered, “Light?”

“I want to see all of you,” she whispered.

Mulder grinned and told her, “I’m not complaining.”

His long arm turned on his lamp and Scully started to grind against him. “What was it like? With William?”

“I missed you,” she whimpered. “I missed you every single moment.”

“Now?”

“Mulder,” she whispered, “it’s three o’clock in the morning. I have work in nine hours. I’m pregnant, tired, and I want you to fuck me. I want those good hormones for me and our baby so I can sleep.”

“Our baby,” Mulder repeated, memorized. He rested his hand on her stomach. “Our child.” She was naked on top of him. Her swollen belly in front of him and he caressed it reverently. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for William, Scully.”

“Mulder, no more talking. I just want to feel you. And our daughter is keeping me up.”

“We’re having a girl now? Wha happened to my son?”

“I’ve decided I am not giving you a choice this time around, consequences be damned. You’re coming with me to the sonogram,” she told him sternly. Carefully, Scully guided him into her. “And I want a girl.” She started to move slowly, enticing his response. “We’re going to have a little girl.”

Mulder smiled, seeing her confidence. “Come on, Scully, let’s play doctor.”

She chuckled and bent forward to kiss him. “I love you,” she murmured. “You know that, right?”

“I know,” he murmured.

She took him into her 

* * * * *

It was three o’clock in the morning by the time she got home. Between Fearon’s surgery, her fight with Mulder at the hospital, Father Joe having his seizure (don’t give up?), and now Mulder abandoning her like he used to early in their partnership. She called the hospital when she pulled up her car, telling her to not expect her until the afternoon. As she climbed the stairs, she unlocked their house’s door. She saw a light from his downstairs office beneath the door.

He was home but he just didn’t want her.

She felt like her heart was stabbed and she clutched her chest and then her swollen belly. Her child...no their child. She remembered with William..everything came down to it to that. She thought she was alone and now, she really was alone.

Scully locked the door behind her, and with tears in her eyes, she climbed the wooden steps up to her bedroom. Their bedroom, she corrected. It might as well be their bedroom. What did she do wrong? She remembered the nights in her Georgetown apartment, crying herself asleep of the loss of him and the future they had together. Now, she had tears in her eyes for the same thing.

Downstairs, he must’ve heard her coming up, because she suddenly heard the stereo in his office turn up loudly. She heard Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young play with “Teach Your Children Well.” 

She screamed her frustration into her pillow and the music went up louder.

Scully cried all the more. What had caused this? What did she do? How did she mess this up? She touched her unborn child...was Mulder even a part of this? Again? She bawled her fist and rammed it against the door. She screamed in pain, not feeling anything similar since he first died. Instinctively, she grabbed her unborn child and went to the bed to cry. Then the music turned off.

She ignored and nursed her brushed hand. Scully flexed it, believing she should still be able to perform the next surgery in the afternoon. She changed into one of Mulder’s old t-shirts and an old pair of running shorts. She crawled into bed. She hugged a pillow. She could imagine herself being much more pregnant and going through this ordeal alone, all over again. But, like a shadow, he came.

“I’m here, Scully.”

He surrounded her and she continued to cry.

She tried to push him away. Her eyes burned from crying. 

“What? What is it?”

“I can’t lose you again. I can’t do this again alone.”

“I’m right here.”

“Are you? Raw and uncut, her words came. “The FBI robbed us. They took you from me. I can’t have it happen again. I can’t survive it again.”

“What do you want me to do? I have to do it because no one else can.” Mulder was silent, knowing what she referred to. Carefully, he shaped his own body so that he could cradle hers. “I’m right here. I’m not leaving you again.”

“That’s not our job anymore, Mulder. I’m a doctor and you’re…”

“Go ahead,” he nodded. He looked at her dejectedly. “Say it.”

She took his hand. “I need you to be a father. We didn’t have this last time. We can have it now.” She sniffed. “We could do that now.”

“How? I’m not a free man,” he said. “That one of the reasons why I’m doing this. I want us to have a life. It’s not just about the life of that FBI agent. I see what this does to you. I want us to have a life too.”

“Do you?”

“What does that mean, Scully?”

She was quiet, drawing invisible patterns on his arm. “Can I speak without upsetting you?”

“Sure, he answered uneasily.”

“I want you to seek help,” she murmured. “Mentally, Mulder. This isolation isn’t good for you.” Her shaking head touched his temple. “If not for me, for the baby.”

Mulder sighed and nodded after a few minutes. “I’ll make a call in the morning.”

She smiled, the tears still stinging her eyes. “Thank you.” Her tears stained their sheets. Mulder took her hand and kissed her. She shied away. “I’m not fucking this up a second time, Scully. I haven’t forgotten about you our little Uber-Scully.”

“You left me today.”

“You said you needed to focus.”

“I don’t want to lose you to the darkness again.”

“You won’t.”

She turned her head slightly and found his lips. “I want you not to forget me.”

“Why would I?”

Carefully, she drew off her cross and dangled it in front of them. “I want you to wear it.”

“Scully.”

“Please?” She whimpered. “I don’t want you to forget.”

He nodded.

Scully turned to face him and held up her necklace between them. Mulder shook his head and delicately put it back on her. “I can’t. I won’t. I’m sorry.”

“I feel like I’m losing you all over again.”

“You’re not.”

“You’re mad at me.”

“I’m frustrated with the case.”

Scully traced his features and he nipped at her finger playfully. She smiled sleepily. “What used to make us happy?”

“Just focusing on us.”

Mulder turned her gently, lingering on their unborn child. “Can I tell you a story, Scully?”

She nodded. He freed the pillow and threw it behind him. He breathed deeply, trying to expand his chest as much as he could. She closed her eyes and pulled him around her. “Do you remember when we just clicked? I fell in love with you on our first case.” He gave a throaty chuckle. “After you marched into my office. The motel room. Do you remember asking for me to check you for mosquito bites?”

She relaxed with him around her and replied, “Tell me your version. In mine, I saved your ass.”

Scully’s voice began to get sleepy.

Mulder flexed. She giggled. “I love you. I wish you knew how much, Mulder.”

“I have an idea. Try to sleep.”

“Will you stay here tonight?” She asked.

“Not for long. The case…”

“Of course,” she mumbled. “See you later?”

“I’ll stay here until you fall asleep, Scully.”

Was that good enough? She reached for his hand and sneaked it up under her sleep shirt. He sighed and closed his eyes. “Tell me a story?”

“Of course, Scully.”

* * * * * 

When she woke up, he was gone. As she went downstairs, the pads of her feet bouncing off the cold hardwood floor. She instinctively put her hand against her swollen belly and called his name, “Mulder? Mulder?”

Her voice echoed in the silence. On the fridge, a rushed post-it note read, “At Quantico. Call me if you need anything. Love you more than anything. - M.” She closed her eyes, not knowing what to feel. She placed the note in a drawer and closed it. What could she do? She was looking forward to seeing Mulder in the morning, maybe having breakfast with him before her day…

Her day. How selfish that sounded.

Maybe she made a mistake. She shook her head and touched her stomach. “You aren’t a mistake, baby,” she whispered to her unborn child.

She opened the fridge to find breakfast and she had a plastic box containing fresh scones. She arched her eyebrow curiously and saw a post with a note on top. She frowned and picked it up. “I’m sorry. I tried my baking skills. Hopefully, it’s edible. I’m sorry for everything. I love you. - M.”

Scully felt her tears stinging her eyes again. Their conversation came back to her. She felt her heart seize. What was she supposed to do? Mulder was never easy to read but right now, she didn’t know what to believe. She toyed with her gold cross as she took out the scones and popped some into the toaster oven. She didn’t know what to believe. That morning, she had the surgery for the Fearon child. Father Joe’s words ringed in her ears: don’t give up.

Give up on what?

Her patient? Mulder? Hope? She ate the homemade scone, trying to choke down the bits. Her anxiety and pregnancy were making it worse. Scully couldn’t focus.

Her hand went to her head as she popped the homemade scone into the toaster. She wished he would be there with her now. That morning, she had Christian Fearon’s surgery. She wanted to talk to him so that she could get out of her fear and her anxiety. But he wasn’t here. He was at the FBI. Doing what he did best. Without her.

* * * * * 

Scully’s mind was racing. The surgery. Everything. Confronting Father Joe the night before was a surreal moment; seeing Mulder with the FBI confronting her. Then the surgery that she had performed on that poor boy that morning. Her mind raced but as she walked through the halls of the hospital, she was surprised to find Mulder standing in the main hallway. She recognized the sadness in his eyes right away. She reached to take his hand but he pulled her against him and crushed her lips. The stained glass window showed more brightly than it did before.

Mulder broke away and she cupped her face in his, forcing him to look at her. “Mulder? What is it? Talk to me.”

He forced himself to try and look at her, stating softly, “They're both dead. Monica Bannan and Dakota Whitney.”

“I heard. Sorry.” She released his face and took his hand. “Are you okay?”

“I thought we were winning, Scully.”

“I know you did, Mulder.’

He took away his hand and stared at her with the wild glint in his eye; the same one he got with their cases. He told her, “I'm here to see Father Joe. I want to show him these photographs. These men.”

Scully sighed. “You still want to believe him.” He nodded. “I think you should know that he has been diagnosed with a terminal illness. He has advanced-stage lung cancer.”

“I just want to be sure.”

“Then let me ask him.”

“I thought you wanted to get as far away as you could, Scully.”

She ignored his barb. “Say I have a vested interest right now, especially in you.”

* * * * *

Everything was crashing down around her. She sat in her office trying to get a grip on reality. Being confronted by Fearon’s parents, her and Mulder’s sudden argument...why did he want to keep doing this madness? She had cried into her hands but suddenly, in her research, a nagging feeling exploded. She tried to call him to give him her lead. No dice. She called Agent Drummy to find Mulder, no dice. Finally, at the bottom of the well of her hope, she called the last number she wanted to.

It answered on the second ring.

“Skinner.”

How many times had she had to make this call? “Walter?” She cleared her throat. “It’s Dana.”

“Dana? Dana Scully.”

“The one and the only.” She choked back a laugh. “How are you, Walter?”

“I could say I’m well but I know it’s only bad news when you call. What’s wrong with Mulder?”

Just like old times.

“He’s not answering his phone. He was supposed to be helping the FBI with a case...an Agent Drummy?”

She heard papers shuffling. “I heard rumors about your appearance at FBI headquarters. The case doesn’t fall directly under me but I’ll look into it. I’ll call you back in a sec.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Always, Dana.”

The phone clicked off and she closed her eyes, feeling her bitter tears. It was happening all over again. She was losing him. A second later, a phone call came back with an FBI number. “Scully,” she answered instinctively.

“Dana? It’s Skinner. I got news of a crash with a car titled to you. I’m texting you the address. I’ll meet you there.”

“Thank you,” she breathed.

* * * * * 

Things were a blur. Finding her car destroyed. Mulder was in the hospital. Again. And she was at his bedside again. Skinner left her quietly and wished her well. His eyes lingered on her pregnancy as he left, telling Scully to call him if she ever needed anything. Lastly, he produced a piece of paper in an envelope and smiled. “Good luck with your future.”

In it contained an official presidential pardon, signed courtesy of President George W. Bush. She cried with happiness and hugged Skinner. For once, they had hope.

But now, in the ER of Our Lady of Sorrow, Scully sat next to Mulder’s bed with her head in her hands. The pardon sat forgotten in her jacket. The medical sounds had become normal to her. Mulder’s head wound and injuries didn’t warrant a constant heartbeat monitor, especially after how she lorded over the attending resident. No one was going to touch him without her permission. 

“Hey, doc,” he croaked.

Scully rushed forward but suddenly stopped herself.

“What is it?”

She was angry, frustrated, and most of all, relieved. “I almost lost you. Again.”

“I’m sorry. God, what the hell hit my head?”

“The side of an ax.” She sighed. “Mulder, you can’t keep doing this to me.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“Bullshit, Mulder.” She had tears running down her face; fucking pregnancy hormones. “I can’t lose you again. We’re going to have a child!” She slapped him with the blanket he was on top of. “I can’t do this again without you!”

Mulder seemed to sober up and urged her to lay next to her on the hospital bed. “You won’t, Scully. You won’t.”

Remorse set into him. He watched her with the tears streaming down her face.

“I have something for you,” she whispered.

“Can you get me a referral to a therapist while I’m here, Scully?”

“What?”

Mulder’s mind, in his drug-induced state, was racing. “Mental health. Therapist.” He remembered something she had said. He didn’t want to lose her or the baby again. “A therapist.”

“I heard you. Are you sure?”

“I want you to know what's for sure.”

“Of course.” She nuzzled his chest. “You’re free by the way.”

“Free?”

Mulder was quiet. As she lay against him, she got out the letter that was folded in an official envelope. “Skinner dropped it off. On the order of the President of the United States,” she said, “all charges and threats from the FBI are officially dismissed. Congratulations. You’re free now.” Scully sat up and patted his chest lightly. “I’m going to see if I can get a referral for a therapist and get you home.”

Mulder lifted the official pardon, eyeing the signature. “Scully,” he called. She turned, pausing by the doorway. “I’m sorry for everything I put you through over these past few days.”

She nodded, bowing her head. An errant strand of hair fell past her face. “I’ll be right back.”

Mulder threw his head against the thin hospital pillow. His head was swimming. This was either due to the blow he took to his head or his emotions. With a shaking, bandaged hand, he looked at the letter of pardon with the president’s signature on it. This really was happening. He was free. He was finally free. He closed his eyes as his headache. Shit, his entire body ached.

He fingered the letter. Where did that leave him? He was an expecting father. Scully...shit...Scully...his other half, his soul mate. He could hear Scully’s boots jog a boatload of memories. “Mulder, we just have to be here a bit longer. I put in the request and the therapist on call will be here about 30.”

“So a bit longer?”

“Yeah.”

Mulder’s head was still swimming. He twisted onto his good side as Scully played with his hair. “I should have learned my lesson years ago.”

“What are you talking about?” She pulled the plastic chair up to his side. “You’re looney.”

“William.”

She stopped suddenly. “It was a hard time.”

“This is a hard time. I don’t want to mess up again, Scully. I messed up last time. I can’t do it again.”

Scully felt tears prickle her eyes. Damn hormones. “What are you saying, Mulder?”

“I don’t want to miss this again.”

Scully drew a deep breath and laughed. She took his good hand and placed it against her belly. “Next week, Mulder. You’re coming with me to the doctor’s appointment.”

“A daughter,” he whispered, meeting her eyes. “A daughter.”

Something changed between them. They had endless anger, frustration, and angst over the past few years. How much had they suffered over the past decade? “Mulder,” she whispered, resting her chin on his arm. “Mulder, I am still afraid for our future. We’ve been on the rocks it feels like forever. I feel like I’m walking on broken glass around our relationship.”

Mulder caressed her cheek with a bandaged hand. “I can change, Scully. You changed me.”

She cast her eyes downward as tears prickled in her eyes. “Mulder, don’t make promises that you can’t keep.”

“What is that supposed to mean, Scully?”

She shook her head. “Last time...with William.”

He waved the letter with his bandaged hand. “I'm a free man, Scully.”

“Free to pursue the truth?”

“The truth is here, right in this room.” He caressed her cheek. “And hopefully, with a little help from a therapist, we can get past this darkness. I wasn’t there for William, for which I regret every day, but I am here now.”

Scully nodded. Her red hair fell about her face like a shroud. “Promise, Mulder?”

“With everything I have.” He smiled deviously. “We’re going to have another boy. I guarantee it.” 

She smiled sadly and rested her head on his chest.

* * * * *  
Scully screamed at the top of her lungs and Mulder felt her squeeze his hand with a strength he never experienced. She panted and shook her head. “I can’t, Mulder. I can’t do this.”

“Scully, you can. You did this before,” he whispered excitedly. “There is no conspiracy or super soldiers, I’m right here.”

She blinked her eyes, trying to clear them, but the pain was too much. “I can’t.”

“What is that Agent Reyes told me? Think of the whale songs. Come on, Scully, we can do this. I’m not going anywhere.” She felt another contraction and screamed at the top of her lungs. “Come on, Scully. Only a few more pushes.”

“You’re not the one pushing a human being out between your legs!” Mulder laughed and kissed her temple. “God, as much as I love you, I was to slap you.” She screamed as a new contraction hit her. “Mulder!”

Her head lolled to the side, shaking it wildly. “Come on, Dana, you’re almost there,” shouted the male doctor.

“Mulder, you promise me, right now. You won’t leave again.”

“I promise.”

She nodded and with one final push and a scream Mulder never dreamed of, there was a cry of new life. He wiped Scully’s brow with his large hand as the nurse rushed to give them a newborn swaddled in blankets. “Congratulations, you have a baby girl,” the nurse smiled proudly.

“A girl?” Scully whispered. She eyed Mulder. “Mulder?”

“The ultrasounds said a boy,” he said nervously.

“Well, I assure you,” the doctor laughed. “You have a girl.”

Scully, with tears in her eyes, looked at Mulder. “Mulder, we have a daughter.”

“What do you want to name her?” He asked in a reverent whisper. “Scully?”

“She’s barely crying.”

“Not at all. She must recognize her mommy.”

“And daddy.”

The baby girl yawned. Her face was red from the new air. Her sleepy eyes blinked and Mulder laughed. “She has your eyes.”

“Your hair.”

“What do you think, Scully?”

“Perfection.” 

Their new daughter whined slightly as they shared a kiss. “Dana,” the nurse said, “try to get her to feed.”

Mulder missed so much. Scully gently pulled down the blanket and whispered, “Come on, little one.”

Her red hair was askew tied in a lazy bun. Her face was glistening, sweat, and the glow of a new mother. He glanced at his newborn daughter, suckling greedily. He wished he had been there with William like he was now. But he knew Scully did the best thing that she could have done then, but this time would be different. This newborn wasn’t a replacement for William but he would do the right thing.

Scully chuckled with tears in her eyes. “We have a daughter, Mulder.”

“We have a baby girl.” He laughed with tears in his eyes. “She’s not a replacement.”

“I know. Mulder, remember, we live for the now.” She gently detached the young baby and passed her to Mulder. “Hold your daughter.”

“I don’t think...”

Scully gave him no choice and passed him the newborn. Mulder held her like it was the most precious gift in the world. “We have a daughter.”

“Yep, dad,” she whispered. “You’re a dad, Fox Mulder.”

“I’m a dad.” He stared at the baby like he used to with an x-file. “Scully, I’m a dad!”

“You’re a father, Mulder.” She felt her heart swell. “This is what I imagined. This what I wanted.”

“I’m a dad,” he repeated like a broken record.

“You’re a dad.”

There was an eager knocking against the door and an eager Ms. Scully burst in. “I drove all the way from Baltimore as soon as I heard Fox’s message. Dana, are you okay?”

Scully smiled sleepily and glanced at Mulder. “Perfect, mom.”

Ms. Scully followed her daughter’s gaze to Mulder who held the small bundle. She gasped excitedly. “Is that my grandson?”

She held out her arms and Mulder gave over the new baby chuckling. “Your newest grandchild.”

“He’s beautiful,” she cooed. “Grandson number five. Grandbaby number six.”

Scully glanced at Mulder with a sad smile, tears in her eyes. Bill Jr had two sons, Charlie had one, and somehow, Ms. Scully still counted, Emily somehow, and William and now, the newest newborn. Scully relaxed against the pillow and smiled mischievously at Mulder. “So, Dana, what are you naming him?”

“Well, Ms. Scully, he isn’t exactly a he,” Mulder started.

“What do you mean? And Fox, call me Maggie. How many times do I have to tell you? What’s wrong with him?” She rocked him and Scully saw the fear flash in her eyes; the same fear that she had with William. “Dana? Fox?”

“Well,” Scully sighed sleepily. “He is a she.”

“He is a she?” Her eyes widened and looked down at the newborn as she processed the information “He’s a she?”

Scully pulled Mulder’s hand against her chest. “We had a daughter...you have a granddaughter, mom.”

Maggie’s eyes widened even more than possible and looked at the baby. “A granddaughter? I finally have a granddaughter?”

“You have a granddaughter, mom.”

The baby whined and Scully outstretched her arms. Maggie delivered the new baby girl back to her mother and smiled. She pulled the vinyl chair up to Mulder. “And the sonogram didn’t show it was she was a she?”

“Nope,” Mulder chuckled. “What was supposed to be a Michael is now up in the air. Maybe Michelle?”

The baby nestled against Scully’s chest and she smiled at Mulder and her mother. Maggie took Mulder’s hand. “What are you going to name her?”

Scully looked up at Mulder. “She looks like Catherine? Don’t you think so, Mulder?”

“Maybe,” Maggie said thoughtfully. “Fox?”

“Catherine...Catherine Melissa Scully-Mulder?”

“Catherine Melissa Scully-Mulder,” Scully echoed. She looked at her mom. “Is that okay?”

“Missy would be proud of you, baby. You too, Fox.”

“She barely knew me.” Mulder focused his attention on their newborn. “I doubt…”

“She knew you were perfect for Dana. Dana, can I have my new granddaughter back now?”

Scully blinked sleepily as Maggie took the newborn, whispering excitedly to her new grandchild. “You know what is next, right? You all are going to marry,” Maggie declared. “And I have to move in. I can’t miss a second of this little girl’s life.”

“One step at a time, mom,” Scully whispered. She was growing sleepy. She tugged on Mulder’s hand so he automatically adjusted her pillows. She smiled at him. “Love you, Mulder.”

Mulder suddenly felt caught. This felt like a dream. For so long, he had missed so much with Scully. He should’ve never left. He felt guilty for bringing Scully on the run for those two years. When they bought the unremarkable house, things seemed optimistic for a while but things quickly went rocky between them again. Then, Scully discovered she was pregnant and that became a band-aid over their wound. But when he finally got his freedom and her pregnancy progressed. All for this moment.

“I love you too, Scully.”

Maggie passed back the baby girl back to Scully who seemed content to be back in her mother’s arms. Mulder leaned close to Scully and whispered, “See, no more darkness, Scully.”

“No more darkness,” she repeated.


End file.
